Old School Problems

I recently found this poem, written in June, 2009

i like your styles
the way you smile
the way you used to look at me
whether grumpy or happy
under that umbrella
but not how you ignore me

somedays i dont mind
other days it annoys me a lot
because i care too much about what you think
even if you dont reciprocate

i hope your doing okay
how i wish we still talked
like the old days

your life without me seems so great
you seem to love not having me around
i like how well you treat every girl you know
except me
and how special you make everyone feel
yet still ignore me

i tried to make this things i like about you
and somehow it turned into things about me
your right once again
things arent always about me
but that doesn’t mean im unimportant
and i won’t apologise for that

Collaborative Composition

These writings
These musings
These poems
Unheard

Should I share?
Does anyone care?

Imagine, if you will
A musician deep in thought
She hums a tune
Then music fills the air

These writings
These musings
These poems
Sung out

Should I share?
Is it worth it?

The lyrics move me
The melody rises
Your beautiful voice
Brings life to these writings

2 Corinthians 9:8

God gives us what we need
Not always what we want
He knows what’s best for us
Though we might disagree

We can’t always see the bigger picture
We might be out of frame
But by His Will and Purpose
We help to set the stage

 

Mother’s Day

Outdoors
A beautiful day
Outwardly
Things are great
I’m smiling
The sun is shining
Internally
Things change

I’m happy for you
Really, I am
But right now
I’m alone

In the midst of
Happy families
Laughter and Joy
I sit in the sun
Alone
Hear my silent plea
I want a friend
A hug
Someone to hang out with
Me

Not wanting to encroach
I say nothing
Put on a smiling face
I know you are busy
Plans already made
So I don’t let you see
The hurt that’s in me

I’m happy for you
Really, I am
But right now
I’m alone

Its days like these
I wish I was home

 

A fleeting moment

Sun shines
Cold outside
People moving, talking
Multi-languages heard
Birds soaring overhead
Small oasis – calming and peaceful
Moment of quiet
Amongst the hustle and bustle
A fleeting moment
The time has passed
I join in
And move on

Stand out, Step forward

Stand out
Step forward
Follow your heart

Don't be held back
by indecision, fear or doubt

Stand out
Step forward
Follow your dreams

Don't be afraid to
share your thoughts or ideas

Stand out
Step forward
Imagine and wish

True friends are
Always here to listen, care
Give support and advice

Stand out
Step forward
Have courage

You only need to ask
I'm always here for you

Stand out
Step forward
Follow's God will

You call me

You call me
To carry out your will
I should feel…
I should be…

Shamefully, I turn away
My heart, my mind
Conflicted
Stubborn
Resistant

Continually, throughout the day
Signs point Your way
Reminders of Your Grace
Mercy, and Forgiveness

Slowly, surely
I lean in to You
Taking steps
Action toward your call

Not on my own
Only with prayerful guidance
And support from beloved friends

In a contest of stubbornness
God always wins
But He will help me
Live His purpose everyday

Faith through Grace

Am I doing something wrong?
I can’t hear you
Am I not doing enough?
I can’t feel you
Am I straying too far?
I can’t see you

How do I
Turn my knowledge into trust
Turn my thoughts into faith
Turn my head towards your heart

I just don’t understand
What I’m doing wrong
Why can’t you just
Speak plainly, clearly

I want to follow you
What do you want me to do
Teach me how to let go
‘Cause I cant do it on my own

I try so hard
Waiting impatiently for
A voice that’s never heard
A feeling that’s never felt

How can I be patient
In the silence
How can I sit still
In the quietness

I don’t understand
why it’s so difficult for me
Lord help my unbelief
Transform my faith

Help me
Please
I cant do it on my own
I cant find you in the dark

By Your grace alone
By Your grace alone.