I miss you today
And often it seems
You come to mind
Again and again

A long-time friend
despite the distance
despite how little we talk

I’m sad I didn’t have the chance
to know you better
But very glad that I will soon
be there in person

for hugs and laughter
for catching up
after months
I hope its just as before



Here today
Gone tomorrow
Tears I see
But smiles too
Fond memories in the past
And hope
For future adventures
Hugs abound
A needy touch
Don’t let go
Here today
Gone tomorrow
I won’t say goodbye
I won’t say goodbye

In the Park

A gentle breeze
Blows my hair
Leaves swirl to the ground
Sun streams through the trees
Still there is shade
The heated air
Summer seems near
People enjoying the park
Babbling babies
The laughter of friends
Couples murmur conversationally
Along I sit
But not lonely
Today I am at peace
I know I’m loved
And cared for
I enjoy watching the scene
I’d love to spin around
and around
and around
My dress twirling out
Self consciousness constrains
My instinct
Instead I watch the kids
Reminiscing of more carefree days
A friend walks past
We smile and hug
Parting ways with just a word
Enjoying the beautiful day
Each in our own way


Feel the pain
The sadness of farewells
See the tears
in the eyes of many
This blockage, heaviness
in the centre of my heart
I wish I could release
through tears like you do
To show how I feel
might provide some validation
That I will miss you all
As much as you say you’ll miss me
I’m sorry, I’ve tried
The cries, they just won’t work
I think I’m broken
A river that’s been dammed
My heart seems stone
Encased in ice
Thawing yet to arrive
When I finally comprehend
I’ll let you know how I really feel


I wasn’t feeling very charitable when I wrote this (May 21, 2017), but you are sweet, kind and loving so it is very hard to stay annoyed at you. I just get very sad that we don’t have enough time to hang out.

So you broke your promise
Don’t worry
I won’t hold it against you
It must have been important
I understand
My self esteem is damaged
I guess I’m not wanted here
It’s good I will be leaving soon
No need to make new promises
I know you are busy
And possibly worn out
Maybe you wanted to spend the time
With your potential other half
But at least let me know
Don’t say you’ll show
And then just ghost away
While I turn down other plans
Sitting alone
Looking like a fool
Forgiveness isn’t easy
I might be a little sour
So you broke your promise
Don’t worry
I won’t hold it against you
For now


Sanctuary Musings 2

Open hands
Open hearts
Receive his love
For ourselves 
On behalf of others
Deep needs met
Only by Jesus
Brought to the altar
Showered over all
How can I help
Someone else?
You alone provide 
All we need
And we show everyone
Friends and enemies alike
The same love
You show us

Old School Problems

I recently found this poem, written in June, 2009

i like your styles
the way you smile
the way you used to look at me
whether grumpy or happy
under that umbrella
but not how you ignore me

somedays i dont mind
other days it annoys me a lot
because i care too much about what you think
even if you dont reciprocate

i hope your doing okay
how i wish we still talked
like the old days

your life without me seems so great
you seem to love not having me around
i like how well you treat every girl you know
except me
and how special you make everyone feel
yet still ignore me

i tried to make this things i like about you
and somehow it turned into things about me
your right once again
things arent always about me
but that doesn’t mean im unimportant
and i won’t apologise for that